“The need for balance is an imbalance.”
This came to me recently, which is a shame really, because I’ve strived for balance my whole life!
I’m so naturally prone, even attracted, to extremism and wonkiness.
I acknowledge that in life, to the degree that we identify with being human (which I know for me is very much), our human needs demand even foundations on which to build on.
Some sense of sanity, clarity, organisation, rationale, justice, synonym.
But there comes a time to move past these dry entities.
The need for them in the first place is a kind of insecurity, even control-freakery.
Implicit in a hiker’s insistence on tracks with exclusively flat terrain, must be an ankle or knee injury?
Wouldn’t hills, caves and stepping-stones add variety and excitement otherwise?
For those who accept Vedic teachings, it is understood that true personhood (in likeness of the Truest Person), and God’s will, are not limited by any human or societal conception.
Self-expression, in its purest form, is free.
Love, in its purest form, has no rules.
I read today a blog [paraphrased here] called “My boyfriend told me to F*** O**, now what?”.
You’re welcome to read it. I found it challenging and refreshing.
Most truths simultaneously stretch and satisfy me in this way.
This particular part resonated with my previous thoughts:
“Rules, passion and love don’t go together. Rules make for a restricted, but perhaps sometimes more “equal” relationship where passion and spontaneity and depth of love are not expressed. Essentially, if you think your partner must never say certain things to you – and you then let that stop you making connection with them in retaliation – you are operating from a script. A pre-prescribed, out-dated rule”.
This “weighing-scale”, “merchant” mentality surrounding life and love is a really hard mental habit to recover from.
Not even just in romantic love, in all our interactions.
To be so measured, so self-centred with our personal tape-measures and tallies, is a real disservice to ourselves and others.
True balance is to disregard (our subjective concept of) balance, and simply flow.
Intelligent, focused fluidity.
To allow some pushes and pulls from people (as no doubt they do with us) and to humbly tolerate in spite of arising ego-righteousness (as we can be sure they also lovingly swallow for us).
Particularly when their intention is good.
And ESPECIALLY when their intention is spiritual.
Bear in mind though, I only believe these things because I’ve been blessed to glimpse them exemplified in real people.
To Srila Prabhupada, the most complete personal example, and the people who truly represent him, I’m grateful.
Also to my husband, who patiently, repeatedly pulls me off my trapeze and reminds me that I can learn more on the ground.
AND to you and your comments, I’m so open to hear.